By Sophie Kendall Corbett, TIWP College Program
“Be patient towards all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue.” — Rainer Maria Rilke
My spirit animal is a cat. I enjoy taking naps, basking in the sun, and I love companionship but at the same time am very independent. Most importantly though, I was born with a natural inquisitiveness and curiosity. I have always had big questions. Questions that would leave my parents at a loss for words as they struggled to find the appropriate way to explain them to a 6-year-old. Is there a God? What happens after we die? Why do bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people? What’s the meaning of life? I was frustrated that no one could seem to give me the simple, one-sentence answers I was seeking. What frustrated me even more was that answers were given as opinions and not as fact. Was it too much to ask whether God definitely existed before deciding if I wanted to be a Christian? Why couldn’t someone have just told me what the meaning of life is from the get-go, so I didn’t have to spend a lifetime figuring it out? My mind was constantly buzzing with questions. I wanted answers, and I wanted them now.
But what I’ve come to realize is that life is not about finding out the answers, it’s about embracing uncertainty as you eventually come to your own, unique answers. Life’s most daunting questions are not meant to be figured out right away, it’s about enjoying the process of piecing them together through what you have learned from life’s experiences. Some questions will die with me. I will not know with a 100% certainty that there is a God until I did, and I am okay with that, and have made peace with the unknown. 6-year-old me would be appalled at the fact that I’ve given up seeking definite answers, and that instead I seek my own truths. You can learn a whole lot more about yourself and the world spending a lifetime seeking your truths rather than being born with all the “correct” answers.